Sponsership / Again

Hey girls, it's me again. I was just wondering if anyone else would want to help sponsor Victoria and Brenda. Rachel, Leanne, Mylandra and myself are already on the team and we are going to sponsor both of them $30 and together thats $60 so if 2 (or more) ppl go in with us it will only cost us $10 each. ok thanx Samm

More Randomness

So once again i'm sittin here, wanting to write something, but not knowing what to write. So i'm gonna write whatever is on my mind right now. Just to warn you, this could be a little frightening. Just kidding. If anything it will be rather boring. So,....i'm pretty excited for baby to come. I keep calling it baby just cause i don't know what else to call it. Calling it 'IT' isn't the greatest either but geez if lynn would hurry up and pop it out already and give it a name i wouldn't have to call it 'baby' or 'IT', so you can see that it's not my fault. I definately think it's a boy. What do u guys think? I love babies. I want a baby. Guys.....i have something to tell you.........just joking. Don't worry that won't be happening for a long time. At least 5 years. So ya, babies are great,....and so cute! You know what else i love? SUMMER! One more exam and i'm free! I CAN'T WAIT! and camp is gonna be so much fun. Leanne! We're goin to camp! I also love camp and kimmy's gonna be there so it will be even more awesomer. IT IS TOO A WORD! You know what's a funny word? Spleen. Hehe. See? I'm so weird aren't i? Life wouldn't be as much fun if i wasn't a little bit crazy. So,....what's everyone else doing this summer? Since i might not see some of you guys before you go away or before i go away( B.C. here i come!) , you should definately write something on the blog and tell us all what ur doin. I love to hear about what people are doin for their vacations or summer holidays or whatever you wanna call it. I'm definately gonna do some serious reading...and writing...and picture taking etc. Twill be fun fun fun. I love the Dixie Chicks. listening to them right now. Yup. I love country music. Yup. I think this is gonna end up being a pretty long post. Oh well. Deal with it! So ya i really hope that retreat thingy at my family's cabin works out sometime at the end of the year, or next year if not this year. That would be amazing! I should probably go to bed so i don't end up falling asleep during my final tomorrow. Last day! Yahoo! Talk to you all soon i hope . I love y'all. That's right i said y'all. Don't know if that's how you spell it but i said it. Ta Ta my girlies.

step back to see God's work

heya, this is a random post, but i was just reading over all of our posts on this blog and looking at the different stuff Gods been doing in our lives. isn't it awesome to be able to look back and see what God's done with us since Mexico

Is he enough for you?

i guess i've been challenged to look at my life. i remembered the time that Trent spoke on the question, "Is God enough for you?" i hope you guys were all there.

this is something God's bringing to me lately and i don't know hhow to react or how to answer. i think fellowship is HUGELY important and i love you guys more than anything, but if everyone could, just for a second, imagine your own life without this blog site, without the mexico team, without sn. high sponsors. Is God enough for you? could you handle being alone? would you worship with the same confidence if you didn't know a single soul in the church service? would you stay commited to journalling and praying if there was no one there telling you that its important or what they learnt on a weekly basis? how different would your worship of God be if there were no other Christians around you? Is God enough for you?

which, don't get me wrong, i guess this is exactly WHY we need fellowship and the support and prayer of other Christians. but God's been asking me, how strong would you be, if you TRULY had to rely on me for everything? if i was all alone and i had nothing but my prayer journal and my bible, how long would i stay commited, stay praising him?

look at the life of Job. he had everything taken away that could possibly be taken. and yet he praised God. faith like that is amazing to me. Job is my hero because everything and everyone in his life was telling him that God had abandon him and that he should curse God, but somehow in the end, he was still blessing God's name. Job is my hero.

i don't have any answers to all these questions because God has blessed me hugely with wisdom, comfort, prayer support from the people around me. i am so thankful for all of you. i love you guys with everything that i have. but i'm just wondering, if i didn't have you guys to turn to, to give my troubles to, Is God enough for me?

in this storm

heyy guys... so, i was just blaring music through my house when this song came up, and yes, it is by casting crowns. so anyways, i was really listening to the lyrics and it was just crazy how this song kinda summs up soo many things that i have been pondering. it just reminds me how God is always, always there, even when we feel we can't feel or hear him. so yeah, here are the lyrics... and yes, i do like posting songs like this, lol you'll prolly see this more often than not... enjoy girlies, love you♥

I was sure by now
That You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry
You raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth

devotionals

i encourage ya'll to subscribe to this devotional thinger. its not really deep or anything, but it really encouraging to end or start your day with a small story of what God's doing in someone's life and just to learn something small. i really like the stories they've had so far, so if anyone's interested go to: www.tddm.org. in the yellow at the top, just type in your email address and subscribe. its really worth it.

yay, whoopie for me!!

*singsong voice* i'm gonna be a bridesmaid! i'm gonna be a bridesmaid.
i'm soooo excited. i haven't even been to a wedding that i can remember and now i'm gonna be a bridesmaid!! I AM SO EXCITED!!
have you noticed how much fun happy dances are. ever since mexico, i keep on happy dancing. i got so much to be happy for!!
my favoritist cousin in the entire world who i have always wanted to be like is getting married and she chose me to be one of her 3 bridesmaids. i lover her more than like anyone in the entire world. (well, maybe not, but i definately lover her lots and respect her soooo much!) yay, i get to be all pretty and walk down the aisle with this boy my age (who's apparently a christian and into sports- but lets not get ahead of ourselves)
I'm gonna be a bridesmaid. i'm gonna be a bridesmaid. i'm soooo excited!

Fellings....

hey girls how's it going? I LOVE YOOU!!! ok so he's what God has been showing me this week. It's been really hard for me to get over Sam. So one day i started reading the scripty thing from that lady in church at mexico and i came across the line... you need to stop living by feeling and start living by faith ( i think that's what it was) but anyways God just told me that it was the same for me and guys and i was like "say what?" and so i started praying and God asked me if i trusted him( jsut like erin) and i was like yea. so i asked God to show me what he ment and the next day i was like ok i do like sam but that doesn't matter becasue i want what God wants for me and just like that 'snap' those feelings went away. So i just want to remind you guys not to live by feeling....even though i totally love you guys!!!

Pride

well, Leanne, i totally agree with that whole accountability thing and writing about what God's been putting on our hearts.
Something that i've been constantly struggling with for the past couple weeks is pride. and i guess a lot of this pride has been coming mainly from leaning on myself for answers and somehow thinking i'm smart enough to get through something without looking to him to see if its what he wants or giving glory to him. and then after all is said and done, usually i find that i'm being a totally hypocrite, or else i'm embarassing myself or else i'm on my knees looking for forgiveness from Him and from others.
like, a couple weeks ago i was walking through the field and it's just this wide open flat space by our school and God's like, "Erin, close your eyes." i'm like, "What?! your kidding me right?" he's like, "do you trust me?- close your eyes" anyway, i close my eyes and i'm walking through the field and i go for about a full minute with my eyes close and finally when i open them and i am so far off the path its kinda embarassing and i'm pretty sure that anyone behind me probably thinks i'm drunk or stupid. and i get mad at god for making me feel stupid and he tells me, "Erin, that's where i wanted you. don't you understand that? it's not about where you feel like being and how you feel when you are there. it's about following me and trusting that i will put you where I want you. and sometimes, your idea is going to be different from mine and sometimes, my way might feel embarassing to you. but you're doing it for me. and i am being honored when you make yourself look small timen and when you give up your pride.
i really want to give up my pride and i know it's a daily thing and not something thats just going to go away. i guess mostly i need to talk less and listen more. i need to actually think about what i'm going to say and ask if it will honor God. i need to serve without pride. its so hard to try and forget about what people think.
"The Lord detests all the proud of heart.
Be sure of this: They will not go unpunished."
Proverbs 16:5
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight"
Proverb 3:5-6

Father, I need your forgiveness for my pride. it's totally detestible to you. give me grace and help me learn to listen and give up this image of myself. i need to learn to trust that whatever you hold in store for my future is better than if i could write my own lifestory. Forgive me father for thinking that somehow my ideas are better than yours. Help others to forgive me too as i learn to deal with this pride. i pray that whatever comes from my mouth would be only good, and only uplifting to those around me. i want to live a life that praises you with what i say and even more importantly, what i don't say. give me disgretion and a heart that only responds to what you say and not what the world around me tells me.
I need to be still and quiet before you. here and now, i devote my mouth to you and i ask you to convict me in ANY unwholesome talk that comes from my mouth. have patience with me God and please forgive me for this stupid pride. make me fall flat on my face over and over again until i finally realize that i have to look up to you before i put my next foot on the ground. I love you God. Amen

Hope you guys can all forgive me

AHH! guys, i am sooo sorry! please forgive me! everyone involved in the "four amigas" and the support4ever blog, i'm sorry. i got the wrong impression and i made it into something bigger than it was.
i guess i got the wrong impression about the whole four amigos. i was talking to someone about it and i guess i wasn't listening as good as i should have. i thought that they were being more serious than they were and that the other blog was somehow hurting their feelings. i guess they were just joking and i'm soo terribly sorry. please disregard the post on the "support4ever" blog.
please forgive me guys. i guess i wasnt listening. i'm going to forget the whole thing happened and i guess i'm asking you to forget about it too.
SOOO SORRY!!!

erika...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERIKA!!!!

Thursday

This thursday it's at Tim Hortons on 51st at 7
can't wait and good luck on your finals

Sponsership

hey girls me again, i was just reading some of the blogs and i came across on that was talking about sponsering a child from mexico and god has really laid that on my heart. i've decide to sponser Victoria and was wondering if anyone else wanted to sponser her with me if you do let me know i still haven't sent the letter in yet

all my love
sammie

hey girls! i finally found out how to use this blog thingy!! How have you all been?? good i hope! i haven't had time to read many of your post yet but i will!!! i love you all!!
Blonde(y)
does that make sense??

Bloggy

Hey guys,
I just started a blog and it's sucky right now but it'll get there so here it is if you want to check it out... how do you do a cbox?
www.anordinarylifemeanttobeextraordinary.blogspot.com
Enjoy!!!

unification of one body

"Let not the sun go down upon your wrath." Ephesians 4:26.
"Confess your faults one to another." James 5:16.
"Forgetting those things which are behind." Philippians 3:13.
"Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you." Ephesians 4:32
we are one body. moving with one purpose and Christ as the head. remember that. and remember what trent said at the start of the week about if you have a problem with your neighbour, don't let the sun go down without confronting them. we need to do this to stay unified.

Gossip

What is Gossip?

well my handy dictionary said gossip is...
A person who habitually spreads intimate or private rumors or facts.

now lets break that down even more habitually means... according to routine or established practice or according to habit or custom. and intamite or private means...( i know your not stupid but yeah.) Very personal. so basically so far we've got gossip = routine spreading of personal things fact or fiction. So yeah know that I understand that where does that leave me. Where is the line? I have heard that statement so many times. so where is the line according to God and his views on gossip...Is it like that saying that goes something like only do what you'd be comfortable doing if your dad was watching. IS that the same with God only say what your saying if you'd say it to God. I know there are some verses out there like... 23 You say, “I am allowed to do anything”but not everything is good for you. You say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is beneficial.1 corinthians 10:23 and the one that says don't make another believer stumble because of your actions. So basically don't say anything if it's going to bring someone down. THat is so difficult. THis is one of my biggest struggles with the bible. because it is not black and white but don't get me wrong I also love it because then I have to search and spend time with God. I'm so used to just having things come naturally to me. I'm not trying to brag but I know that my life is not difficult even though I complain and there are people living in the streets or dealing with difficult family situations. so... How do you draw that line? so basically I'm back where I started and I don't know. is this line a personal thing or is this line set between God and I. Why is there gray area?I know I'm not the only one dealing with this and I hope there is someone out there with more wisdom on this topic. I'm nt even sure why I'm writing this...

Random stuff

Well, i got to school today at 8:25 as usual and i totally forgot that i didn't have first period. I know i'm a dingus.So here i am in the library at school, bored out of my mind. So i'm writing a whole bunch of random stuff cause i feel like it. My first final is tomorrow.Ahhh! i'm scared. Actually, not really. I'm doing good in math, it's chemistry and physics i'm worried about. Anyway, 8 hours in the library everyday should fix that problem.Lalalalalala i'm so bored and i don't know what to write anymore.Hmmm.Music, i like music. Music would be nice right now but i don't have music so i can't listen to musis which sucks cause i love music. I CAN'T WAIT FOR SUMMER HOLIDAYS TO START IN LIKE 8 DAYS!i love summer so much.Can't wait to go to the lake leanne! Oh yeah for all you amazing girls, if it all works out, and i think i told some of you, i am planning to invite all the mexico girls out to my family's cabin in september as sort of a retreat thingy(would cost money like the youth retreat). Not for sure and if it doesn't happen this year it will happen next year.so yeah it should be fun.OH my goodness! You know what i just thought about? I'm graduating next year! that's a scary thought. I don't even know what i'm doing after high school. Oh well i'll worry about that later.Sorry for writing such a stupid long blog.Well, maybe it's not that long. I can't tell.Guess what else i thought of?
THE GAME! Hahahahaha

Big Praise Item!

I made S.R.C.! I'm quite excited...so excited, in fact, that these two sentences get their own post!

... (too lazy to think up a title)

Rach, i totally agree, since i got home, it feels like i'm just not putting effort in because it seems pointless. i was talking a little to trent and graham about this and they said that we need to honor God in everything we do. that's one of the only things that has kept me doing anything in school lately. I have faith that God will help you pass physics. I will be praying for everyone.

Hey erika, i was wondering if you could do that list of other blogs we read because so many people have their own blogsite too. this is mine by the way:
http://www.rinner-thatrac8ballgurl.blogspot.com/

Prayer Request

Hey everyone,

As everyone knows, school is almost over for the year(Yahoo!). I know we could all use some prayer for our finals, some more than others (cough cough). Since coming home from Mexico, my mark in Physics 20 has dropped 11% and now if i don't pass the final i will fail the class. Guys, I really really don't want to fail physics. I have already started to study hard core for my exam but i know that i need God to help me out on this one. If you could all pray for me i would be very grateful. I love you all.

Thursday Meeting

Hey girls,

So what are we doing this thursday? When and where? Can someone send out an email?

Child Sponsorship

i'm not sure if anyone else has already gotten in contact with FFHM and if they have sorry. I decided to email and ask. i'm haven't really got a whole bunch finalized but i was thinking if we are planning on a full sponsorship, we should try to have a meeting on how we want to do this. this is the first email i got from FFHM. I can take the responsibility of taking all the money from each member involved and sending it together or we can all sponor seperate. anyway, i need feedback and anyone wanting to be involved, we should have a meeting.


Dear Erin,
You can sponsor a little girl at the Baja mission if you choose. Please tell us the age range you would like the
child to be and if you have a specific child, let me know and we will see if she is open to new sponsors. Usually sponsors
donate $25 or $50/ month for co-sponsorship, but you can give up to $200/month for a full sponsorship.

You can contact me at cindi@ffhm.org with any questions you have about sponsorship.

Regards,
Cindi Fink

comments to big for the comment box on "Hearing from God"

oh my goodness. I am soo glad you wrote all that stuff because i've been having the same thoughts that you wrote about in my head, but i didn't know how to express them. Erika, you are such an amazing woman of wisdom through God.

Just to echo, God is not a feeling. feeling is fleeting. I remember two summers ago when i went to the quest with you- Katelynn, Grace, and Steph. the year before that was one of my first spiritual highs and i was totally ready for it again. Anyway, that week i felt absolutely nothing from Him. I was so frusterated that i didn't feel anything i talked to ally- (remember ally?) and then she, the speaker Jason and i all talked and that was one of the first times that i got told that faith is not based on feeling. I didn't quite understand that and i was still a little miffed at the fact that God seemed to be ignoring me.

Last year I was ready again for the spiritual high and although i did get some, it wasn't as earthshattering as i somehow thought God should provide for me. Now i realize that i wasn't being patient for Him. He's the one with the perfect will. He (i'm really sorry for using this) wears the pants in our relationship (LOL- sorry, okay focus erin...) When he comes to you, it is the most beautiful thing you will ever taste, see, hear, experience. But he's the one in control. He is the one with the perfect will. I had to give up on somehow thinking that he should listen to me even though i was calling out. He's always testing us. and he will never test us farther than we can go.

What i got to experience down in Mexico was nothing short of the most beautiful thing i've ever known. (i say this NOT to rub it in your face at all). I know that i keep on telling about how i got to see and feel joy firsthand. But i guess i haven't told why this joy came. in the depths of my spiritual desert, when i felt like i would never get out if i didn't get out soon, that's when something even bigger than finding joy happened. The sermon on manna gave me something more solid than i've ever felt before. That sermon was when i realized that he WILL never leave me. I'd heard it before. I'd "known" it. But i never quite "knew" it. He said through someone else, I will never leave you. and for the first time, i TRULY believed it. you need to live based on faith and not feeling. the Bible is fact. live with faith that is dependant on fact. He showed me that he loves me. even though it wasn't necessarily Him speaking, when Carrie gave that sermon, it was like God had ordained that moment from before i was born just for me and Him. I wish more than anything i could express this. I wish more than anything one of you had gotten to get this gift because it's SOOO AMAZINGLY BEAUTIFUL. it's not something i can tell you that you will just understand. I pray that God will show you. He's not really talking to me right now and i have every reason to think that maybe he's not there except that i know now that nothing could make me think that after what he did. i want to express this so bad, but it's not something i can express.

I also realized on the thursday or friday after church in mexico that it didn't have to be me. i don't know why he chose to give me this gift. Goodness knows i don't deserve it. But i need everyone who stood that day at church to know i would gladly give this gift to anyone if i could. It's too beautiful and i want to share it. But i also know his will is perfect. and you will get gifts from Him that i will want more than anything.

Patience is a pain. But it is written that love is patient and if you love God, be patient. He is always with you. more than anything you need to know that. He is with you. and when the time is right He will come to shower you with blessings. Keep thirsting after Him. Keep collecting your manna daily. your pain will turn to blessings.

Another thing that i want to echo that Erika said. dont' make time in your day to just sit in his glory and don't look for something big. be content in the things he brings. I went early to help set up on friday with Jeff and mylandra down to the forestry farm and they have a fishing pond out there. i sat on a rock and just listened to the pond and watched the beauty of the pond and that was a blessing. look for little things.

He gives and takes away.

He gives and takes away.

My heart will choose to say,

Lord blessed be your name.

i will pray for you who are still feeling lonely.

Hearing from God

So, a lot of you have been posting things about not really experiencing God here...for yourselves, in your normal lives...but I want to challenge you in saying that there is no need for this to happen! It's true that God will take you through spouts of spiritual dryness, to show you that you absolutely need Him, but that doesn't mean we can't hear from Him, even through those times! I want to ask you all a couple of questions:

1. Do you know who you are in Christ?
For those of you who were in the service today, I guess this is kind of like when Pastor Chet said that we need to come to the realization that we cannot be completed by any other person (not even through marriage)...only by God. This is just my personal belief, but I think that before you start dating, you need to establish yourself as a woman of God. Otherwise, it becomes incredibly easy to compromise yourself and settle for "completion" through the world.

2. Are you always waiting for some big flashy sign from God?
Being natural (carnal), we want to hear or see or touch the Holy Spirit naturally. We want a natural sign! And sometimes God does send us natural signs...but the Holy Spirit does not operate naturally, but supernaturally and spiritually! What does this mean? We need to be in tune to God's voice spiritually! And how do we start to hear God's voice? It all starts in His Word! The more you know of the Word, the harder you will be to deceive. The harder you are to deceive, the harder it will be for Satan to get you off track, and when you are on track, fighting the good fight of faith, then you will live victoriously. God does not only want to help us in what we have labelled "spiritual stuff". He wants to be a part of our lives on every level! He wants us to ask him to help us wake up, do our hair, get dressed, and drive to school. And I want to be a part of all of your lives on every level, too! (I threw this in here because I noticed that Katelynn posted a thing on her other shared blog and said that it was too random and pointless for the One Way blog. No way! We want to be involved in even the most pointless and random things, and so does God!) Anyway, it's like Mike said this morning: eternal life (or life to the full) doesn't start when you die: it starts now! I'm not sure if this means anything to anyone, but I felt like I should share this with you guys! I want to leave you with something that my mentor told me:

In order to hear God, we need to get into his Word! Why? Because...
from God's word comes faith
From faith comes hope
From hope comes joy
From joy comes strength
and from strength comes the VICTORY!

Amen and amen, again and again!
He takes over my scars and I put my life in His.

Oh, and just to follow suit to Grace and Katelynn, if you guys want to read my blog (which hasn't been updated in ages!), you can check it out at http://anotherdayapart.blogspot.com

if we are the body...

heyy hunnies!!! well its my first post... imagine that! yeah well anyways, im just bored, sitting here on the computer(obviosly). anyhooo... about that title... well its actually a song by casting crowns. its a really good song, here are the lyrics:

It's crowded in worship today

As she slips in

Trying to fade into the faces

The girls' teasing laughter is carrying farther than they know

Farther than they know

CHORUS

But if we are the Body

Why aren't His arms reaching

Why aren't His hands healing

Why aren't His words teaching

And if we are the Body

Why aren't His feet going

Why is His love not showing them there is a way

There is a way

A traveler is far away from home

He sheds his coat

And quietly sinks into the back row

The weight of their judgmental glances tells him that his chances

Are better out on the road

CHORUS

But if we are the Body

Why aren't His arms reaching

Why aren't His hands healing

Why aren't His words teaching

And if we are the Body

Why aren't His feet going

Why is His love not showing them there is a way

Jesus paid much too high a price

For us to pick and choose who should come

And we are the Body of Christ

Chorus (2x)

If we are the body

Why aren't His arms reaching

Why aren't His hands healing

Why aren't His words teaching

And if we are the body

Why aren't His feet going

Why is His love not showing them there is a way

Jesus is the way

yeah... so those are them... the lyrics just really made me think. ha, its just like what leanne was saying yesterday bout love... we really need to show that love to everyone around us. what a challenge. we need those arms to be reaching, those hands to be healing, and those words to be teaching. i think that we need to put this body to work.

question

heyy girls. bible study was nice last night, more of a coffee than anything. i would really like to do a study. I know we sorta talked about possible studies and books that we could do. what did we decide on and are we supposed to go an buy a book or get anything?? thanks....
xoxoxoxox

katelynn's blog

just thought i'd let you all know of my blog. then you can go read it. haha

http://pointlessandrandomstuff.blogspot.com

missing y'all

wow, i really miss you guys. i have that picture that candace gave all of us of our team by the blowhole and i was looking at it, and I REALLY MISS YOU GUYS!! i CANNOT wait until friday. my goodness.

Request.......

Hey Oneway girlies,

I was wondering if you guys would pray for one of my friends. You see she knows who God is and she believes in Him but she doesn't live out her faith,I know I don't all the time either, I didn't even know she was a christian until a couple months ago. Well anyways she is having a really hard time right know because some people are spreading rumors about her( not very nice things) She was just ignoring it the first few weeks but it's really getting to her and she is really desperate. ..

So I pray the God would comfort her and make his presence known to her life. I ask that he would be her strong hold and that she would learn to trust him and really change her focus onto him. I pray that Erin and I could be rolemodels to her and that we would encourage her towards our amazing God. Lord please give her hope and bless her with safety. Lord please be with her. I know you can do this. Please grow the seed that has been planted into her heart Lord.
In Your Holy Name.

k...

k, i know i just posted but i have decided to write some more. usually on my blogs i write about my day but now im going to write something different. k, well i thought that after being in Mexico i would come home having a beautiful relationship with God and i would feel so close and connected feeling with him, but.... turns out that i don't. im not sure why, im not mad at him, i love him and i believe in him. but im don't have that "spiritually high" feeling like after a retreat or something. i dunno. Mexico was amazing and i felt God's presence there with me, it just didn't totally come back on the plane with me... what do i do?

the only answer i know for sure is pray....

God... im crying out to you ... i long for your love and mercy. i know im not always the best christian but i want to keep trying. Forgive me for ignoring your calls. I realize that i need you. You are my friend. my only true friend... you are the one who will save me out of this pit of darkness and hopelessness that i've fallen into. Help me to be close to you. i need your love...

desperate...

heyy guys.. ugg im sooo bored..i miss u all!!!!

responce to "my friend, the athiest"

feeling a little more than a little stressed. i want to sleep. but prayer is needed and i love you to much to wait for tomorrow what i could do today. i'll just type with my eyes closed.

first rach, i totally get what your saying about it breaking your heart when people just don't get it. its so simple and beautiful and its so hard for us, who have this amazing savior and friend in our lives to understand how anyone could live apart from that. but its awesome that you are trying to shine in his life and that you are such a hard worker in the field. the harvest is plentiful and you are doing your job in harvesting even though it may feel hopeless. since i got home i've been totally hammered with just how big the harvest is and i'm feeling almost overwhelmed with all the souls out there that need to be saved that somehow i never noticed before. just keep looking to God for strength and wisdom. remember he is the only one with the power to change hearts. all we're here for is to show what a changed heart looks like.

Father God, you have so much power. we ask you for miracles in the lives around us. God, i thank you for rachel and her willingness to do your work. God i pray that you would keep her strong and courageous for you. help each one of us to live for you. God i pray for her friend. We lift up his life to you. you have an awesome love that we want to share with everyone. mold his heart to how you want it. surround him with people that glorify you and open his heart and his mind to listen to you. we want to live for you and give glory to you. Father, i pray that you WOULD send out more workers into the field. we know we can't do it without you and i pray that others would see your heart through our actions and our words.

SHOUT OUT TO GRACIE: IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY, ITS YOUR BIRTHDAY, YOUR SIXTEEN HUN!! WOW, WE'RE ALL GETTING OLD. HOPE YOUR FEELING BETTER DARLING. I LOVE YOU.

My friend, the athiest

Well tonight i had a very interesting conversation with a friend of mine from outdoor school who is an athiest. Guess what we talked about. Gay marriage. The first thing he said to me after i said hey was "What do you think about gay marriage?" The question caught me off guard. I wasn't expecting to be discussing this subject just then. A few minutes into the conversation I became quite frustrated because I know what I believe and what I think but I couldn't articulate those thoughts, I couldn't put them into words that seemed to make sense to him. There was a point in the conversation where I wanted to cry because I absolutely hate it when I am talking to someone who doesn't believe in God and I can't seem to convince them that there are any valid points to christianity. It breaks my heart when people I know and care about don't see or feel the wonder I do in God's power and love. God loves them but they don't see it and maybe they never will. What can I say to convince them otherwise? I don't know the answer but I wish I did. So the conversation went on and we started talking about other aspects of spirituality and I asked him what he thought of death. Did he believe in life after death? No. To him, when you're dead, you're dead. Another arrow in the heart. Can God make him see? Of course He can. Will He? I don't know. Can I somehow, through God's power, not mine, show him that there is more than life on earth? that there is life after death, and that he can live in eternal bliss with the creator of everything? I need prayer guys. Pray for my friend, one who does not know our God, that God may soften his heart towards Him and pray that God would give me the words to say and another chance to say them. May God be praised always.

happy brithday grace

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GRACIE!!!
OR MORE SPECIFICALLY, HAPPY SWEET 16!!
I LOVE YOU!

my bloggy

heyy girls, just letting u know that i have a blog if u wanted to check it out..
its www.duckster-g.blogspot.com
hopefully see y'all tomorrow!

prayer path, rugby, and pants

1st: who got to go to the prayer path and how was it? i'm just a little mad i couldn't go because it looked... i was gonna say fun, but thats not the right word. hmmm, it looked really .... good. because praying is good because God is good. anyway.... wow, i feel like i haven't seen any of you in years. grrr. i need my girls. softball sucks. i don't know why i play it. it stinks.
2nd: rugby has got to be the most akward, hilarious game ever. sorry for anyone if they actually play it, but it feels like all you do is either stick your head between your teammates butts or hit the ground hopefully with another opponent attached. i was the "eight man" in gym yesterday so i got to see pretty much half of all of my teammates butts sticking right in my face. it's kinda fun. me and paul tackled each other. "i prefer my left side, please."
cheek to cheek- HA HA HA!! then millie girl got this image of trent trying to play rugby and you know that hilarious look he gets on his face when he's shocked or confused? she got that image stuck in my head and we were basically rolling on the ground laugh our heads off.

anyway, miss you guys alot.

God, i lift up my gracie girl to you. we believe in the power of prayer because over and over you showed us how powerful you are and how much you care about the little things that happen in our lives. your depth of love for us is astounding. father, we bring you our sister Gracie as she's not feeling well. We know your healing touch can help our sister. Holy spirit, i ask that you proect our girl from any serious illness and we pray that she would be up and going soon, so each day she could shine for you. Give her joy even through sickness and let her bless your name always. you are so good to us. i ask that if it's your will, you bring Gracie back to full health quickly.
God i also ask that you bless the little boy whos become a part of the Owen family. they have so much to offer this little one and i pray that this child would grow strong, joyful, loving, and patient. I know that the Owen family has a lot of love to give and will protect this little one from harm. GOd i pray that this boy would grow to love you and honor you. i pray that whatever his future might bring, that your holy spirit would forever surround him.
GOd you are good and we love you. I want to lift up all my other sister on this blog and the rest of the missions team as we continue to learn how to daily live for you, honor you, and be a shining light for you. Let your amazing love shine through us. we want to be able to touch the nations and we want to be the workers in the field because we know the harvest is huge is we apply ourselves to loving our neighbours and being fishers of men. God we ask for strengh and peace. Bless us and keep satan from us always.
AMEN

prayer request

heyy guys!!! im finally posting. well. i have a prayer request for y'all. Well two maybe. One, for myself. I've been sick with a bad cold the last week and i get pnemonia really easily.. i've had it 3 times this past year. its not good if i get it again. So if u guys could pray that God would heal me that would make my week. Also, as most of you all know, our family is a foster family. We basically take kids in and take care of them until their parents (usually a mom) can get better. Hence we have Destiny, my baby sister. This afternon my mom got a call from social services asking if we could take a little 2 year old boy for a few nights. She said yes and when i got home there was the most adorable kid in my house. He doesn't speak a word.. he can but he doesn't talk. he smiles sometimes but mostly he just scrunches his face up in sorta a pout. i m not allowed to say anything else about him, but if you could pray for his situation and future that would also rock my socks. Hope all of ur weeks are goin good. love you all!
grace
xoxoxox